Wednesday 12 January 2011

Gay Clubs and the Straight Women who love them

There was a question on Formspring recently about banning straight girls from gay clubs. Everyone was aghast. How could you discriminate against the straight women! Gay men should know what discrimination is so why would you treat women the way gay men are treated? I had a different reaction. I’m all for banning straight girls. Every time the police are called to my local gay clubs/bars, it’s because a drunken straight girl has started a fight, attacked the bartender or gotten pissed because she couldn’t get a gay man drunk enough to fuck her. Not one gay men has been arrested in the 3 I’ve been legally able to go to bars. It’s always been the straight girls. For one week, the main gay club had a no straight women policy. You know what? No fights, no injuries, no police cars, no shutting down the club early. The straights and some gay men fought that rule so now we’re back to allowing drunken straight girls (usually named Jen, Laurie or Tiffany) into the clubs, and the drama continues. What does this have to with supporting gay men? Showing gay men affection? These clubs are designed for gay men. They’re spaces that gay men can come together to drink, dance, make out, and yes, hook up. Yet what do these clubs spend most of their time on? Cleaning up after straight girls. Worrying about when the next drunken straight girl will go off. Perhaps, Ohio just has an abundance of drunken straight girls. The straight girls in other states may be wonderful  & trouble free. I have my doubts as I follow at least 3 gay men on twitter who’ve been injured because a straight girl started a fight in a gay club. Why are we worrying about the straight girls? Why do the gay men who go to these clubs have to tolerate this ridiculousness?

Yes, I know. I’ll get the discrimination argument, but why must gay clubs be open to straight women at all times? Straight women have so many options. They can go almost any place they want. Gay men do not have that same ability. Can you imagine 2 gay men going into Hooters or a sports bar and holding hands or making out? How many gay men feel comfortable going to clubs that cater to mostly straight men? We have gay clubs so that gay men can feel comfortable, feel a part of a larger gay community, be with other men. There is nothing greater than being in a room with gay men, and feeling the energy, the smells, the way we interact with other, etc. Straight women intrude upon this, and it pisses me off. If it were an occasional thing, it’d be different, and I’m not talking about the straight women who are wonderful & do not cause trouble (although I would prefer to have their admittance limited to certain nights) but I should be allowed to go to a gay club & not have to share my experiences with straight women every time I go. I don’t go to women’s only club meetings & try to make the event all about me. I allow that there are certain activities & events that should be for women only. Women should have places where they can go and be together without men interfering as we usually do.

I’m gay, but I’m not a half woman because I’m gay. I’m a MALE. I am also not one of those men who desperately wants to be seen as normal so straight men and women will like me for being more straight than gay. “Look at us! We have 2 dogs, a cozy home, like to spend our evenings in, bake cookies for our neighbors.” There is nothing wrong with that if that is who you are, but if your only reason for being that way is to get straight approval, I find that attitude pathetic. Live your life for yourself not to blend in and be “accepted” by the straights. I don’t play the normal gay card. One. I bake for no one, and two, I don’t see blending in as a good thing. I’m in favor of everyone maintaing their own distinct identities. Three: I don’t perform for straight people. I never look for their approval of who I am and what I do nor do I want to be put in the position of giving approval to heterosexuals. I’m gay and that does not mean I’m looking to be a straight woman’s accessory while she’s between relationships. “Look at Suzie! She’s brought the best of the Spring 2011 collection of gay male friends to the party.”

I should be able to have a few spaces in my life where I can go and be surrounded by gay men & and have no outside interference from straight men and women. Don’t see why this is is so shocking. I’m not asking for separate societies. I’m asking for a room of my own so to speak: a place where I can go & be proud to be gay without diluting it for the consumption of others.

Tuesday 11 January 2011

More of the best in gay porn 2010 (with a few worst of thrown in for good measure)

More of the Best:
Paul Wagner--An out gay man in gay porn (says something when you have to point this out) who started on Sean Cody & has graduated to becoming one of the most underrated and consistently excellent performers. Always a smile, always a great performance, and he shows through his performances why a gay man doing gay porn is so important.

Hard Friction 2 and Hard Friction in Australia: I can’t tell if Hard Friction 2 is a great collection of scenes because I never get past the scene with Steve Cruz and Alessio Romero--two of my absolute favorites. They devour each other, and it’s a sensual flip-flip that I find so hot. There is nothing hotter to me than two guys who perform like they are into the fucking. Cruz and Romero could just talk (fully clothed) in a scene and I would get off because I find them so hot, but this scene is incredible. Cruz’s husband, Bruno Bond has an audition scene with a performer, and the way Bond and Cruz talk to him, tease him, and then Bond’s foreplay is slow and steady, and I can hardly bear it. I know Cruz takes over in the scene, but I never get that far. Bruno’s performance turns me on so much that this is the scene that prompted more sexual fantasies than any other scene. I’m so in lust with Romero, Cruz, and Bond.

Lex Sabre:Yes, he has a large penis. Yes, he’s uncut. Yes, he is a great top, but what I appreciate about him is the self-deprecating humor he shows in his scenes as well as on Twitter. Nothing hotter than a hunk with a sense of humor about himself. When Sabre is the top in a scene, he connects to the partner. He makes eye contact. He is an attentive top and caring top. Sabre has a recent scene on Suite703 that is probably the best I’ve seen from them in a while. Sabre looks incredible, and the scene has great rhythm, and Sabre turns in a fabulous performance as a bottom. Is there anything hotter than seeing an uncut dick loaded with cum?

A theme is emerging here, and it’s that I respond to scene where there’s a connection between the performers. I don’t respond well to mechanical fucking or where one performer (usually the g4per) shows no interest, and maintains the g4p distance from the partner. I want to see two (or more) men fucking in gay porn like they never want to stop having gay sex. I want gay sex to come across in gay porn as the greatest thing in the world--the way it is in real life.

Kennedy Carter and Kyle King--They did a Hot House live show where they chatted a bit, made out a bit, and then fucked. What made this scene work? The scene showed their personalities. It started off with them chatting, being playful, making out, and then the sex. There was real build up. They had such great chemistry and you really don’t see this kind of chemistry when the performers are bi (fake bi or not) or straight. **A minor gripe to the man who kept interrupting the scene to tell one or both of the performers to move or to do something. Shut the fuck up! Performers know what to do, and even if they don’t, I prefer a messy scene to a great scene interrupted by some asshole who won’t shut up. Let performers do their job!**

Rod Daily and Trent Diesel who use condoms in their scenes with women. I don’t enjoy straight scenes. They don’t turn me on, and I prefer my performers to be gay but I applaud these two performers for using condoms when most other “bi” models and g4pers go condomless in their straight scenes--sending the message that gay sex is so much dirtier. A fuck you to the industry that promotes and encourages condomless straight scenes, but goes into hysterics when it’s a barebacking scene between two men even even when the testing procedures are the same.

Another worst of Arpad Miklos to not only doing a straight for pay scene, but doing it in a very homophobic way designed to show how much of a man he is because he can fuck a woman with the best of the straight men: something every gay men should be proud of apparently so I much be a poor gay man for finding that idea despicable. My masculinity is not based on whether I top or whether I bottom or whether I can fuck women (which I haven't and will never do). I’m a proud gay man who doesn’t need to cater to self loathing gays or dilute my sexuality to appeal to straights & gay men who see straight sex as the ultimate in masculinity. I don’t need to prove anything. Miklos not only did the scene in an offensive manner but he did it without a condom, and then badmouthed gay sex, gay porn studios, and gay fans. Way to maintain a fan base. OF course, he continued to get hired, but what if he had barebacked a man? All hell would have broken.

Shane Frost--underrated performer who always gives his best. Another out gay man who is usually cast as a bottom (and he does have an amazing ass), but he’s a versatile performer who knows what makes a scene work: connection to partner, touching, kissing, and making the viewer think this is the best sex he’s ever had. Frost does all this and more.

Humor is so rare in gay porn. So much of it is so humorless, but John Magnum in Bottoming 101 for CocksureMen managed to be informative and sexy while maintaining a wicked sense of humor.